The Clothes Have No Emperor

Remember the fairy tale about the two smart aleck weavers who made a coat for the Emperor that was invisible to fools and incompetents? 
Well I was in the White House the other day and sure enough there was BO walking around in circles and scratching his chin.
“How’s it going today, sir, you seem a bit perplexed,” says I.
“Newshawk! How is it you keep getting in here? I’ve told the guards to keep you out.”
“Oh. They’ve all read my new book.”
“A new book, huh? What’s it about?”
“I refuse to answer on the grounds that doing so may result in a drone being sent to my house.”
I got a dirty look from him, then he said, “While you’re here maybe you can help me out.”
“At your service, sir, as long as you don’t ask me to endorse any of your policies.”
“Tell me something; do I appear naked to you?”
“Physically or mentally?”
“Am I wearing any clothes?”
He wasn’t, but remembering the story, I replied that of course he was. “Why do you ask?”
“Everybody else around here says I’m naked.”
“It looks to me that, at least physically, you’re wearing a very fine Italian-made suit. It looks very comfortable, by the way.”
“It’s very light-weight. Hard to believe I’m wearing anything at all. But I can’t understand why everyone else here the White House doesn’t see it.”
“It has to do with character.”
“But why are they laughing?”
“That’s a different matter, in the altogether.”
“But why do I appear naked to them and not to you?”
“Maybe its because I think the clothes have no emperor. It has to do with you thinking of yourself as the Emperor of the United States of America. Have you ever heard of anything so ridiculous?”
His face lit up and he started breathing real hard. “You better watch yourself. I’m not the only one who thinks that way, you know.”
“Those would be the ones who see you with no clothes on, I presume.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Either I’m clothed or I’m not clothed.”
“Depends on who’s looking.”
“Yeah, exactly. Why, when I went to that fund raising dinner the other night, they all stood up and cheered. Some said it was a brazen new style I was setting. Bare to the bone, you know. Some of the chicks looked me over pretty good; come to think of it, so did some of the guys - a couple winked. A couple of drunk designers said they think they can sell a design like I was wearing. You should have heard those liberals scream and clap, all yelling, Hell yeah, they’d buy one. You would've thought they finally recognized who I am.”
“Well, I don’t know. There’s a whole lot of liberals I would not want to see in the altogether. Their birthday suits looking like half-filled grocery bags”
“Well, there are always executive orders to take care of that. But do you think people will go naked just because they see me that way?”
“Of course, sir, there are so many who adore you.”
“Yes, how true. Can’t blame them, really. It must be my personality.”
“Or your skin color. Don’t gloat too much. Half the country thinks its a mental disorder. That you’re all having a huge hissy fit. You’ve managed to turn the country on its head – not hard to believe the tradition of wearing clothes will be next to go. Liberals seem to favor anything indecent.”
“I don’t know what you mean. Mental disorder?”
"Liberals have changed the entire fabric of  what made America great. It’s a country run by pussies; even so-called conservatives betray their constituents in favor of  sissy liberal policies on a regular basis. White males are routinely being replaced on television by women, although the women bring no more to the table than a man would. Laws favor the criminals. You say you’re trying to create jobs but are daily putting more regulations in the way. And this political correctness jazz is pure insanity; It doesn’t let people be themselves. All this is nutso, and half the country favors it.”
“So you think I’m nutso?”
“You’re their leader. They even like the clothes you wear, Mr. Emperor.”
“So despite what you think, mentally, I really am the Emperor of the United States of America.”
“Not really. I think, mentally, you’re bare-assed naked. I mean really!”
“Now, wait just a damn minute …”
“Relax, will ya. It’s just a fairy tale. You should know all about those.”